Have you ever had a day when it seemed difficult to get going? In fact, have you ever had a period in your life when it was difficult to get going every day? Over thirty years ago, I found myself in a state of depression in which it was extremely difficult to get out of bed. While physically I was quite capable of getting up, my mental and emotional state had me paralyzed. Many people experience a similar mental and emotional paralysis when trying to control their appetites, start an exercise routine, stop smoking, etc. I discovered a few mental tools that helped me to get out of bed and to keep putting one foot in front of the other. As I struggled to get out of bed, I tried to push myself, by saying, “I am going to get up on the count of three.” So, I counted, “one,” “two,” “three.” When I got to three, nothing happened, so this proved to be ineffective. In my mind, I wanted to move but my willpower was not strong enough to move my body. Instead of giving up on my plan I decided to reduce my goal to something I knew that I would achieve when I reached the count of three. I had to match my willpower to my present potential, so I reduced my goal until my willpower was strong enough to move my body.
Unless you have struggled with lack of willpower or depression, the goals I set after that may not make sense to you. I realized that with any goal setting, the more successful you are in reaching short term goals the more likely you are to stay the course for your long-term goal. Instead of saying that I would get up on the count of three, I said that I would put my feet on the floor on the count of three. When that did not work, I said that I would put one foot out from under the blanket on the count of three. When that did not work, I said that I would wiggle my toes and rotate my ankles on the count of three. Bingo, I was successful! After being successful at wiggling my toes and rotating my ankles on the count of three, I now progressed to putting my feet out from under the covers on the count of three, and then placing my feet on the floor on the count of three, standing up on the count of three, and so forth and so on.
This may make getting out of bed seem like an arduous and painstaking task, but for me at that time it was, and for many people even this simple task can be difficult. It was not simply this strategy of counting from one to three that empowered me, but that combined with the added component of keeping my word to without deviation. I know the value of keeping my word to others; I had to learn the power of keeping my word to myself. If my word is my bond, it must be bond to me first. As Polonius told Laertes in Shakespeare’s Hamlet, “and this above all, to thine own self be true; and then it follows and the night doth the day, that thou canst not then be false to any man.” I told myself that I was going to do something, and I kept my word to myself. These simple tools helped me to initiate and implement change in my life. I still use these two tools today when faced with something challenging or something that I do not want to do. If we are going to be disciplined for success, we must develop a “push” strategy for ourselves.